Thin Air, High Hope

Earlier this year, I decided to read the Bible from the beginning. Not like a textbook or a checklist, but a faded letter from an old relative: slowly, with curiosity and without pressure. I am not looking for something profound every time I read. Instead, I want to try and listen to the voice behind the words, like spending time with someone I want to know better and more deeply.

As I read, I became especially intrigued by Abraham. What stood out to me from the beginning was how normal he was. He didn’t shut the mouths of lions or part the Red Sea. He didn’t slay a giant or rise to kingship. He traveled frequently, dealt with marital tension, grew his estate, managed business relationships, and worried about relatives. He told half-truths, experienced fear, and lounged outside his tent in the heat of the day. He was deeply human. And yet, three of the world’s major religions trace their roots back to him. He’s known as the father of faith.

And maybe most incredible of all, he was called God’s friend (James 2:23).

Friendship, in many ways, is such a simple concept. You see it clearly on playgrounds: one child runs over and takes another’s hand, and just like that, a new friendship begins. And yet somewhere between the playground and adulthood, it becomes obvious that friendship, like every good thing, takes work, intention and perseverance.

I want to be God’s friend. But honestly, I often struggle with being a good friend to my fellow humans, let alone to the Creator of the universe. What would that even look like? How did Abraham do it?

A little while ago, I posed the question, “What makes a good friend?” on my Facebook page. I was grateful for the many responses, and I found the variety of answers meaningful and insightful (if you responded…thank you!). I decided to group the responses into themes, and then revisit Abraham’s story to see how he lived out each of those qualities in his relationship with God.

1. Trust
2. Emotional Safety & Acceptance
3. Support & Presence
4. Growth & Encouragement
5. Shared Joy & Compatibility

Trust

I plan to explore each of these over time, but I wanted to begin with trust. Trust was mentioned the most among the responses, and though the concept of trust may vary by individual, the simplest Oxford definition is, “a firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of someone or something”.

I once heard Brene Brown (love her!) say that trust is built through hundreds of small moments. In friendship, trust flows both ways. Each person offers a bit of themselves to the other, and as that vulnerability is received and protected over time, trust deepens between them.

Abraham is known first and foremost for his trust in God. When God told him something, Abraham believed Him. God said, “Go to the land I will show you,” and in the very next verse, Abraham went. As their relationship developed, we see God responding by entrusting Abraham with more of His own thoughts, promises, vision, and even His plans for a violent city where Abraham’s relative was living. 

Referring back to the definition of trust, Abraham was reliable as demonstrated by doing what God asked of him, and Abraham also had a firm belief in the “reliability, truth, ability, or strength” of God.  As they took the opportunity to demonstrate these characteristics to one another, God and Abraham exchanged trust and nurtured a friendship.

What does this look like for us, for me? I am guessing there are a thousand directions to take this, but here are some of my initial thoughts.

I’m sure Abraham didn’t always fully understand all that God asked of him. When asked to leave his country, Hebrews 11 says he “went out, not knowing where he was going.” And when God asked him to sacrifice his son Isaac, Abraham didn’t seem to fully understand, but he also trusted who he knew God to be. He carried out what God asked, not because he knew everything, but because he believed that God would make a way. He trusted God’s character more than the circumstances. Hebrews continues: “Abraham reasoned that God could even raise the dead, and so in a manner of speaking he did receive Isaac back from death.”

When I fail to trust God, I cast a shadow on God’s character. If Alex tells me he’ll do something and I respond with anxiety, uncertain whether or not he’ll follow through, I’m saying something about what I believe to be true of Alex. In the same way, when life hands me hardship, job loss, illness, or other types of heartbreak, and my first response is bitterness or doubt, I’m revealing what I believe to be true about God. I am doubting his “reliability, truth, ability, or strength” to pull through and/or show up in that particular circumstance.

I’m not saying we won’t struggle with anxiety or sadness, and part of building trust is even expressing these real emotions. But when we let those things be the end of the story, when we don’t “reason” our way toward faith in God and His promises, we’re not showing up for Him as a friend.

Just as we’d defend a friend we deeply trust because we know their heart, we can do the same for God in hard seasons. We can cling to who we know Him to be, just as we would cling to the truth about a trusted friend. But that kind of trust doesn’t appear overnight. It’s built in the quiet, easier seasons, through small moments together, praying and learning the stories of Scripture, and by noticing all the ways God shows up in our everyday lives.

Abraham built altars throughout his journey as he encountered God. Maybe those altars helped him remember God’s faithfulness, concrete evidence of how God had shown up. Maybe we can do the same. We can build our own “altars” in the good times: a journal entry, a painted rock, a note tucked away, a small token from a treasured memory or answered prayer. It’s not so different from what we do with our friends: that special photo or little gift that reminds us of our relationship with them. These tangible reminders can become evidence for our own hearts, our own little altars, testifying to how God has shown up before and how He will again. 

I look forward to exploring each of these characteristics of Abraham’s friendship with God. As I mentioned earlier on, I can’t help but notice how normal, (dare I say average?), Abraham was in his everyday life. And honestly, that’s so encouraging to my heart. I don’t have to part seas or build an ark. I don’t have to prophesy on mountaintops or perform miracles to be God’s friend.

I just need to pay attention, building trust in the small moments, seeking to be reliable to Him, and defending His character with what I know to be true, when the whole world and all the circumstances challenge His goodness and character.

This we can do, my friends.